Almost Losing a Child; an Easter Reflection

"Kayla's Longing"  12x16  Watercolor  ©Toni Rupper

Last week I almost lost my artistic muse of 18 years.  My daughter was in a car accident in which the car was totaled.  I call her my muse because in addition to being a gift from God, she has truly been my inspiration and creative stimulus.

As an artist, I sit and reflect on Kayla as my creative muse.   I realize that many times, I’ve taken her for granted.  I’ve been on “artsy - auto - pilot” many times.

Kayla has posed for me and I’ve drawn and painted her through out the years. “Stay there!” I shout as I run to get my camera. “Hold that pose please,” I plead as I rush to get my pastels.  From the time she was a wee one, I’ve practiced my artistry with her. 

"Best Friends II"  12x16  Watercolor   ©Toni Ruppert

The Night it Almost Changed

As a Mom, I sit here and reflect on my daughter’s accident.  I came upon the night scene with flashing lights, police and my little car off to the side at a weird angle.  The car was on the opposite side of the road, turned backwards.

After being directed to park across the road, I made my way back to find her.  I hugged her and commenced the serious work of being a Mom to a teen who has experienced a car accident. 

Later, as my husband and I went to retrieve our belongings from the tow company, I saw the wreck in daylight.  A machine. Smashed, crushed and destroyed.  My daughter and her two friends walked away unscathed.

I praise God for his infinite mercy in this matter.  It could have been much worse.  I can not imagine a parent losing their child in this way.  As I said, my child has been my inspiration for close to 20 years:

"Dreaming of Innocence"  24x36  Acrylic  ©Toni Ruppert

"Kayla Sleeping"  12x16   Charcoal  ©Toni Ruppert

"Kayla Sleeping"  18x24  Mixed Media  ©Toni Ruppert 

"Kayla Posing for Me"  9x12  Pastel  ©Toni Ruppert

"Angel of Glory"  9x12  Watercolor ©Toni Ruppert

"Longing II"  12x16  Watercolor  ©Toni Ruppert

"Dreaming of Innocence"  24x48   Acrylic  ©Toni Ruppert

"Deliverance" 9x12  Acrylic  ©Toni Ruppert

Contemplating Easter

As last week fades more and more into the back ground, I reflect on Kayla...my art...and the Easter message of love.


Mary's son Jesus was crushed and it was no accident.

Isaiah 53:5
But he was pierced for our transgressions, he was crushed for our iniquities; the punishment that brought us peace was upon him, and by his wounds we are healed.

Author and pastor Frederica Mathewes-Green offers her thoughts about Christ's crucifixion in her post, "Viewing the Crucifixion in a Different Light." 

 God did not spare his child.  I am a Mom and I cannot fathom the deep power of this kind of love.

 My friend, illustrator Gail Green said it best in her Facebook comment to me on my Facebook Page "...the message of Death and Resurrection is all the more poignant when we contemplate the deep pain of losing a child."

It is something to reflect on.

Give Up On Your Dream? No Way!

'Worship in His Presence"   36x48 inches   Watercolor and Ink  ©Toni Ruppert

My sister-in-law, Bridgette, called me the other day and asked me "Aren’t you glad you didn’t give up on your dream?” I almost ‘died’ right there because that day, I felt like I was in the middle of a Job-like experience and my current dream seemed out of reach.

But after speaking to Bridgette, I discovered that it’s all in perspective.  She reminded me of the year 2004 - a significant year for me.  That was the last time I worked as a secretary-who-really-wanted-to-be-a-full-time-artist. 

She brought to my mind how all I had hoped for at the time was to schlep my stuff to a Borders bookstore.  Maybe, just maybe -  “they” would give me permission to show in their cafe.   

After she said that, it prompted me to review my journal from March, 2004.  I saw: 

--I wanted to be in an art show and barely had an artist statement together
--I wondered if the local park district would let get a spare wall to paint on
--My Thursday night watercolor class with Lenox Wallace at The Center in Palos Heights was my lifeline and only artistic outlet
--I tried to share my portfolio with an admissions person at a local fine arts college
--I brought my portfolio to work to show to the public relations rep. - I longed to paint something  - anything - for my employer

Lots of dreaming, hoping and praying in March 2004.  

Then, in 2008, God prompted me to take a step of faith. That one step was to walk through a door HE opened for me. That door led to my second public art project for a city library. That second project was huge and helped me and two other artisans financially.

As I contemplate my sister in law’s question, “Aren't you glad you didn't give up on your dream?,” I know my answer. 

And there are more creative dreams for 2012 that I’m not going to give up on.

What dream are you not giving up on?

20 Minutes a Day (How to Get it Done)

Do you have an immovable project?  No sure how you'll tackle your next goal? Try working on it 20 minutes a day. Check out this 1.5 minute video where I share a concept that is helping me: http://youtu.be/LOgT1MfA09k

As I shared in the video, my latest oil portrait painting is being created in about 20 minutes a day. I get my paints out. I set my timer and get to work. Some days are good and some days... 

But since I’ve been at this for about 3 weeks - lo and behold, the painting has started forming.  I looked up after a painting session and saw the portrait beginning to take shape.

Why? 20 minutes a day. 

I obtained the idea from author Julia Cameron in her book, Finding Water: The Art of Perseverance.   In one of her suggested tasks, she advises readers to spend twenty minutes daily in their art form.  She also suggests utilizing believing mirrors - “friends who are friends to our work” to help us stay accountable. 

So I enlisted my friend Lisa to help me.  I checked in with her either before or after I painted.  She was tough too and yet very encouraging as I made progress.

Day 1 - Oil Sketch on Canvas - ©Toni Ruppert

Week 2 - Oil on Canvas - ©Toni Ruppert

 I lost count here but this was further along in the process...

This one below is where the painting is now.  Just a few more sessions and it will be completed.

"Granddad and Grandma" - Oil on Canvas - ©Toni Ruppert

Again, perhaps you have something in your path- a goal or a monster project.  These words have encouraged me as I take my 20 minutes and place them in God’s hands...

• “Who dares despise the day of small things...”(Bible-- Zechariah 4:10)

• “Be strong and courageous, and do the work. Don't be afraid or discouraged by the size of the task, for the LORD God, my God, is with you. He will not fail you or forsake you.” (Bible--1 Chronicles 28:20)

• “The odds stacked against us as an artist immediately lessen if we are in fact doing our work.” ~Julia Cameron

I believe paintings and other goals can be completed with small actions.  So go ahead.  Locate that goal in your heart.  Find your timer and get started.  It’s “just” twenty minutes.

Question: What huge projects have you completed using small doable actions?  What goals can you still achieve using the "20 minutes a day" method?

Your Future Success is Tied to Your Outlook

"Breaking Free" ©Antonia Ruppert - Acrylic, 8x16 inches

Something happened today, yesterday and will continue to happen to people everywhere:

The average person will generate 25,000 to 50,000 thoughts per day.

This was reported by David Carnes of Livestrong.com.  He quotes Hara Estroff Marano, Editor at Large of Psychology Today magazine. 

Many of these thoughts will be surprisingly negative. Billions of earthlings everywhere will think and act on these thoughts.  Many of us, myself included, are becoming more intentional about our thoughts. I'm getting more creative about keeping a positive outlook.

My painting "Breaking Free"(shown here) illustrates the pushing past of negative thoughts.  The words say, "No" and "No not you." At some point, the hands come up to push aside the negative words.

This is important because "For as he thinketh in his heart, so is he..." (Bible, Old Testament).

Working at Being Positive
 I work daily on being positive by:

1. Calling friends when situations got dicey.
2. Calling upon my believing mirrors when I just don’t feel like painting.
3. Catching up with my artist friends and checking in weekly about artsy stuff and family stuff.
4. Focusing on what I have to be thankful for.

I try to maintain a positive outlook, despite the fact that my outlook does not always match my situation.

For example, yesterday my youth art class, “Artists with a Purpose” started in Tinley Park, IL.  This unique class will raise money for a local charity by creating 100 acrylic painted panels and selling many of them.  As I drove to the class, I realized that I had not grabbed all of the acrylic paint--nor did I have gesso(acrylic primer) for the 24 panels I wanted my students to work on.

As I was strapped for time, I made the decision to be on time for my class and not make an emergency run to Hobby Lobby. At first, during my journey, tears were in my eyes as I thought of the “disastrous” class that awaited me.  Then something shifted, as I thought of my daily affirmations:

1. I Thank You God that your gracious hand is upon me.
2. I Thank you God that your favor keeps my enemies from triumphing.
3. I Thank You God that your favor will make a way.
4. I trample all obstacles and roadblocks to receiving unlimited
   prosperity.
5. The more grateful I am, the more reasons I find to be grateful.

 I had no idea exactly how it would all work out.

When I arrived, I met art teacher Carolyn - who was just finishing her class.  A master teacher, she told me she had been teaching at the Tinley Park Park district for 18 years. 

Without me asking, Carolyn and her aide Linda started helping me set up for my class.  First, Carolyn gave me tips on making my first day of class great.  Second, Linda actually helped me place newspaper on the tables to protect them - saving me loads of time.  Third, Carolyn pointed out that there was a bag of new acrylic paints in the supply cabinet. 

I felt overwhelmed with God’s favor.  In conclusion, the first day of “Artists with a Purpose” was awesome.

Final Notes about my Artistry
As promised in my last post - here are some of the work shown at my last show with artist Sylvia Westbrook at the Meet the Artist Night at Acorn Library in Oak Forest, IL.

This is "Happy Friday"...

"Happy Friday" ©Antonia Ruppert - Mixed Media, 9x12

and this is "Delivered and Set Free"...

"Delivered and Set Free" ©Antonia Ruppert - Acrylic, 8x10

I’ll leave you with this quote by LeAndria Johnson, Grammy winner -best gospel/contemporary Christian music:

“Always be positive.” “Don’t focus on the negative things in your life. Focus on the positive. The yes in you will be the yes for somebody else.”

Successful Art Show (And What Made It So)

So, how was our show? Tinley Park, IL artist Sylvia Westbrook and I spoke to an interested and packed room.  We shared 22 works of art.  And folks loved the 12 sweet potato pies that my Mom made.  Besides having the presence of Mom's pie, there were other factors that helped us.

Artist Sylvia Westbrook and I - ©vanWestrop Photo

 What made our show successful:

1. Completion. Sylvia and I focused on completing our respective tasks.  We kept at it until each task was done.  Sometimes she reminded me of tasks(most times) and sometimes, I reminded her.
2. Collaboration. Working with another artist on the show from beginning to end was delightful.  Teaming up with Sylvia made the experience fun and halved the work.  After working with her, I have decided to never again run a Lone Ranger show. 
3. Commitment. We decided to commit to the show and to each other. I never felt that Sylvia did not have my best interest in mind. I got to the point that I did not have the frames--for my  pieces.  Sylvia had hers, but I did not have mine.  Sylvia was an encouragement.  Another  artist, my friend Pamela Casey further encouraged me and I committed to getting the frames.  The miraculous happened.  I was helped by seen and unseen hands that day and was able to frame the pieces I desired to frame.

Sylvia Westbrook speaking; painting by Toni Ruppert - ©vanWestrop Photo

More on Committment...

In “Be All You Can Be,” by John Maxwell, the author quotes a card which he at one point carried with him:

“Until I am committed, there is a hesitancy, a chance to draw back. But the moment I definitely commit myself, then God moves also, and a whole stream of events erupts.”

Sylvia and I committed to utilizing social media, texting, e-mail and etc.  We committed to honoring other artists (Boston based artist Lois Mailou Jones and Chicago based artist Marva Lee Pitchford-Jolly.)  We also committed to prayer about our nerves, tasks, responsibilities and minor stuff like the Powerpoint presentation.

Guess what? Folks responded.  They brought people that we had no idea were going to show up. I should not have been shocked when things worked out.  In the Old Testament, Proverbs 14:23 says, "All hard work brings a profit..."   

©vanWestrop Photo

©vanWestrop Photo

We were thrilled to see friends - old and new in our audience...

©vanWestrop Photo

  I will share more of the paintings I shared at the show soon.  More show images will be posted to my Facebook Page.  Feel free to head over there.  If you have not--I invite you to “like” my page while you’re there.

Toni Ruppert speaking; painting by Sylvia Westbrook; ©vanWestrop Photo

So, how was our show?  It was a lovely experience.  I'm glad you  - my reader - were able to experience it here with me.

Getting Excited About Presenting Art History Makers in Oak Forest, IL

Detail of "Breaking Free," ©Toni Ruppert, Acrylic on Canvas

Sure, I’m geeked. So much has happened since I last posted and so this post is a bit longer.  Hang in here with me, OK?

First, let me tell you that the image you are seeing here is a detail of a painting I call “Breaking Free.” The full painting will be shown to attendees at my next show. If you are planning to be near Southland Chicago in February--plan to stop by and see the full piece. Yep, I’m enticing you. You’ve got to come to the show to see the full piece.

The details about the show are below.

About the Presentation
Chicago Southland artist Sylvia Westbrook and I thought it would be great to not only showcase our work, but also share the work of Boston based artist Lois Mailou Jones and Chicago based artist Marva Lee Pitchford-Jolly.  We will be presenting our findings about them on Thursday, February 9th, 2012.  The night will include our work, a presentation about Ms. Jones and Ms. Pitchford-Jolly and will conclude with questions from the audience.

Research: Lois Mailou Jones
Sylvia Westbrook is a breath of fresh air when it comes to research.  Her goal was to find out about Ms. Jones and find compelling stories about her.  Ms. Jones, a textile designer, mask maker and painter worked in a number of mediums including watercolor, oil and acrylic. 

Ms. Jones believed that talent is the basis for a career, but hard work is what determines ones success.

Sylvia will present Ms. Jones' art and a bit of her history. One story that had us both laughing was when Ms. Jones broke art world color barriers in 1941. She won the Robert Woods Bliss Award for the “Indian Shops, Gay Head, Massachusetts” - a landscape painted in 1940.  This was awarded to her though the Corcoran Gallery which had a policy that forbid African Americans from participating.    Ms. Jones had a friend who was white submit the painting for her and so that she would not be rejected, she accepted the award via certified mail.

Much of Sylvia's research comes from resources such as The Life and Art of Lois Mailou Jones by Tritobia Hayes Benjamin.

Research: Marva Lee Pitchford-Jolly
Ms. Megan Mall with the Acorn Public Library helped Sylvia and I both come up with resources.  I was thrilled to find information about Ms. Pitchford-Jolly, a sculptor.   

I found that Ms. Pitchford-Jolly, now retired, contributed to various art organizations in Chicago.  Her work is documented via the History Makers.com page on Marva Lee Pitchford-Jolly.

After hearing about her story pots, spirit women and friendship pots from Sylvia, I had the idea that maybe I’d meet her at some point. 

Good news! Sylvia assisted in orchestrating a phone interview with Ms. Pitchford-Jolly.  I was a bit nervous, but really thrilled to actually talk with her.

One of the things she helped me see was the idea of honesty in art.  She said, "Going with what is popular is a dead-end street.” She went on to say that even though an artist might not "want to be ridiculed", one “can’t help it.”  One must be “honest about doing what’s not popular.” 

I have taken pages of notes from our conversation which I will first share with attendees of our reception tomorrow.

Details of Our Show:

Meet the Artists
Thursday, February 9, 2012
7:00pm-8:15pm

Acorn Public Library (large meeting room)
15624 Central Avenue
Oak Forest, IL 60452
www.acornlibrary.org / 708-687-3700

The actual exhibit dates are : 
February 1 - February 28, 2012

All attendees need to register in person or by phone at:
Acorn Public Library - 708-687-3700.  

Questions
Think of your biggest obstacle right now in your own field. What would you do if you could have an established person in your field speak to your circumstances?  What would you hope they’d say? You can leave a comment below.

Sharing a bit of Art and Black History in Oak Forest, IL

Toni Ruppert @Orland Park, IL Library - Van Westrop, photographer

In honor of Black History Month, Birmingham born artist Sylvia Westbrook will join me as we share our art and celebrate the life of two African American women artists; Boston-born Lois Mailou Jones and Chicago based Marva Lee Pitchford-Jolly.

We will celebrate them with a “Meet the Artist" night in which we discuss their work. At our venue, Acorn Public Library(Oak Forest, IL), our work will also be on view.  We will answer questions from the public. 

I am thrilled!

I’m especially happy to be showing with Sylvia.  The quintessential artist, Sylvia creates in oil, acrylic and pastel.  Having seen her abstract acrylic paintingss - I know attendees are in for a real treat.

Though Sylvia studied at the School of the Art Institute of Chicago, she says her talent is a “God given ability.”

Sylvia will talk about Lois Mailou Jones and I will discuss Marva Lee Pitchford-Jolly.  In addition to talking about these artists, Sylvia and I will share our work which will include new pieces of art.

The show will go up during the month of February and the “Meet the Artist” night is scheduled for February 9th.

If you are in the Chicago area -- do join us:

What:  “Meet the Artist"
When:  February 9th, 2012, Thursday 7:00pm--8:15pm
Where: Acorn Public Library (large meeting room)
             15624 Central Avenue
             Oak Forest, IL 60452
             (708)687-3700

Right now, Sylvia and I are researching and preparing our art.  My goal is to share each step of the event here on this blog - so you continually get a “sneak peek.”

Are any of you familiar with either Lois Mailou Jones or Marva Lee Pitchford-Jolly?
Feel free to share information and any pertinent links with me in the comments below.

Meanwhile, is there something you'd like to know about these great artists?  We invite your questions.