Being Disappointed Without Being Disappointing

"Love in Diversity" - Mural proposal ©Antonia Ruppert

Life is messy. Have you noticed that there is no way around that? We are not perfect but human. And as humans, we grapple with disappointment. This week has proved this to me in living color. 

But first, might I share the last few weeks in pictures?

©Antonia Ruppert

Painting Live for After the Due Order CD release
©Photo by Les Stevens

Robin Tillotson (thisidoforme.com) and I at my Loyola U show.
©Antonia Ruppert

"Portraits of Motherhood" exhibit at the Cicero Public Library
©Antonia Ruppert

After traveling, live painting for a CD release and two back to back shows at Loyola University Chicago and the Cicero Public Library, I was not expecting this week to get so messy.  I guess I had my guard down.

This week, my very good friend and fellow artist Elaine shared a mural opportunity with me. Though we both realized too late that the deadline had passed by one day, I called the organization. I was told that I had until the next day to get my materials in.  I was elated. I jumped.  Really fast -  I jumped. My eighth grade teacher Mrs. Mae would've been proud of the way I kicked procrastination to the side and got on with it.

I decided to create something that I thought was huge and magnificent. I stayed up way too late and got up early to finish.  I even put it out on Instagram and Facebook to get input about my idea.

Which one? Top or Bottom? ©Antonia Ruppert

After all that, I finished in time.  One little messy detail was that the mural opportunity had a boundary restriction - meaning artists had to live in a specific area.  I called the gentleman back from the organization to inquire.  I eventually called twice and left an email. 

To make a long story short, just before sending the mural proposal I called the organization again. This time he picked up the phone and said matter-of-factly "Oh yes, you definitely need to live within this area." Crushed.

Nope, I did not get ghetto -  thank God. Yes, I kept my sanity.

Despite being utterly frustrated, I managed to call my friend Pastor Sarah who shared some wisdom. "You've got to be disappointed without being disappointing."

After coming to grips with the failure, I found these to be truths:

1. Thou Shalt Not Take it Personal: 
This gentleman's inability to call me or email me back is not a sign of anything related to me. It wasn't even about me, just something that happened.

2. Being Disappointed is OK, Letting It Go Is Better:
Don't run from the emotion. Hold it. And then let it go. Go for a walk. Jump on the treadmill. Write in your journal. Self-care.

3. Fill Your Head With Gratitude and Affirmation: 
Perhaps you find yourself, like me, severely disappointed in a circumstance. We can still find 10 things that you can positively be grateful for. Check out my inspirational renewal cards. Currently available, you can take 10 seconds and redirect your outlook. We can be affirming. 

4. Tons of Folk Have "Been There" Too:
In the book, "Daring Greatly," author Brene Brown talks about "common humanity" in which one can realize that "suffering and feelings of personal inadequacy" are part of being human.  All of us go through this.  

In conclusion, if you can relate today, be encouraged. Life is messy but we're not a mess.  As I leave you with my positive affirmations, remember we can be disappointed without being disappointing. 

Daily Affirmations ©Antonia Ruppert

Antonia Ruppert: New Art, New Show.

Faithful Heart
12x12
Mixed Media Collage

Sixteen mothers. All different, all strong. Chinniese said she was honored to be a mom. Tina was faithful with the two children she had, and now holds a new baby. Elaine, an artist, mother, workshop leader and blogger managed a household and an art practice.

I am grateful to know them. 

Twenty two years ago, when I became a mom, I was a student on Loyola University's Lakeshore campus. Overwhelmed does not begin to describe my feelings. There were many mothers including my own who supported me in deep and compassionate ways.

Peggy's Future Assignment
12x12
Mixed Media Collage

Over the years, I have connected with many moms. That connection meant friendships, shared laughter and real life tips. I missed that connection after moving here. 

I decided to get to know the moms around me- one painting at a time. 

I have painted 20 paintings and am presenting them this spring--Portraits of Motherhood at - Loyola University, Lakeshore campus. Here are more details. 

Date: The paintings will be up until April 22. 

Time: 9-5:30 weekdays, please call 708-508-8400 for an appointment

Address: 1020 W. Sheridan Rd. Chicago 60660. (2nd flr. in the Mundelein Center for Fine and Performing Arts)

Here are some pictures from the opening:

Portraits of Motherhood
Opening Reception
Loyola University Chicago

Portraits of Motherhood
Loyola University Chicago

Portraits of Motherhood
Opening Reception
Loyola University Chicago

For more information about the exhibit, please click here to go to my website. 

Click HERE for purchase info. Just click on the picture.

View more of my work at http://toniruppert.com.

Sign up for my newsletter HERE.

My mission is to create connections using personal stories, with layers of color and meaning. I'm elated to share the joy I have experienced in making this new art. 

Connection and Devotion: words for 2016

"Growing Heart and Hearth"
Acrylic Mixed Media
12x12
©Antonia Ruppert

As I start 2016 with this first post, two words comes to mind: connection and devotion. 

Connection is something that we all need. Though we are connected via technology, some of us are yet alone or lonely.  As an artist I am acutely aware of this.  I started a project, "Faces of Strength" last year to connect to other moms in my neighborhood.  I have not mentioned it in a while here, but read this short post to catch up.  

Here is where devotion comes in. Devotion. Love, loyalty or enthusiasm for a person, activity or cause.  It is only pure devotion to this gift of an idea God gave me that keeps me going. It keeps me going from good to great.

This is the beginning of the painting shown above:

"Growing Heart and Hearth," progress picture

I almost said OK, but then I listened to "Three Feet from Gold" an audiobook by Sharon L. Lechter and Greg S. Reid.  In the book, entrepreneur Debbi Fields says, "Good enough never is..." 

I went to work in devotion.

"Growing Heart and Hearth," painting in progress

"Imaginary Parts" shown below is another painting that could have stopped at good enough. The painting was really missing something at first.  Then my daughter called me. I relaxed.

After talking for a while, I glanced at the painting and then the missing piece hit me. 

"Imaginary Parts"
Acrylic Mixed Media
12x12
©Antonia Ruppert

These first two paintings of the year will be shown along with others in the "Faces of Strength" series.  I am so thrilled! They will be exhibited at Loyola University Chicago this spring.  It is my intention to share more details about the show as we get closer to the show.

Let me ask, what are you devoting yourself to this year?  How will you connect deeply as the year progresses?

Art Everyday Finale - Morning Devotion

Morning Devotion
12x12
Oil and Acrylic
©Antonia Ruppert

This morning, I awoke and had devotion time. That time reading scripture all connected with this watercolor painting to create this new oil piece, "Morning Devotion."


The collage below shows the inspiration/process. It started with the watercolor painting which was created yesterday from an idea and a batch of photography. Then this morning, after devotion time and another photo, I was curious how the whole idea would look in oil.

Morning Devotion Inspiration/Process
Watercolor - left
©Antonia Ruppert

If I learned anything from this past month's art everyday challenge, it's this- Be Open.  One never knows where an idea is coming from. 

Art Everyday.  As I end this challenge, I reflect. Though I did not post every single day, I created something everyday - for which I am grateful. 

Art Everyday Month - Sunday Meditation

Sunday Meditation © Antonia Ruppert

Today's art started out as an encouragement to myself.  Some of the words are:

Be encouraged.
Focus.
God will handle it.

Then I added my daughters names in the hair. And then I thought of my nieices and younger cousins. So their names were added as well.

This is my prayer/meditation for today.  I want to see these lovely sentiments for the next generation.

Art everyday=making art for others.

Art Everyday Month--painting at the edge of the day

Sketch - after the circus
©Antonia Ruppert

After cooking, cleaning, visiting the circus and putting the child to bed--we ushered in art.  Now that is creating at the edge of the day as author Toni Morrison suggests.

Sometimes these types of sketches become part of larger works--like here:

Dreaming of Innocence
Acrylic on Canvas
©Antonia Ruppert

and here:

Dreaming of Stars
Acrylic on Canvas
©Antonia Ruppert

Dreaming of Christmas
Watercolor
©Antonia Ruppert

Whether a sketch or an actual painting, these creations have become a testimony to the bible verse "Whatever your hand finds to do, do it with your might." In this season of life, I try not to "despise these small beginnings" as scripture says.

Sometimes painting at the edge of the day=Art Everyday. 

Art everyday- sweetness

Cranberry cake

© Antonia Ruppert

Ahhh!  This was my Thanksgiving dinner contribution. I love the cranberries folded into vanilla, almond, flour, sugar and butter. 

The family taste test results are in: the cake part was truly yummy but the cranberries were very tart.  Pucker up!

Here is a lesson--don't skimp the sugar. In an effort to lower calories, I used a 1/2 cup less of sugar.  And one could tell. 

Lesson learned.

That lesson carries over into art. Whether you are a new or seasoned collector, know this: working with an artist to create your decor is using all of the sugar.  

Working with an artist --like me--means sweet results.

I'm thankful for all who venture to work with me.  

Commissioned landscape

11x14

Oil

© Antonia Ruppert

Thank you for reading my posts, following me on Facebook, for purchasing my work and for your positive feedback.

I'll have another chance at that cranberry cake. I will make another one for a dinner party I'm hosting on this Saturday.

Believe me, I will not skimp on the sugar.  

See http://toniruppert.com/links for ways you too can add real sweetness.

Thankful for these 4

Landscape Progress
©Antonia Ruppert

Where I am, folks are getting ready for the Thanksgiving holiday. After spending much of the day cleaning, organizing and decorating...

©Antonia Ruppert

...I loved making progress on my painting shown first above. 

After reading blogger and wordsmith Melanie Jongsma's Thanksgiving post, I thought I would also share four projects I'm most thankful to have worked on this year.

1. Faces of Strength 

This nine month project was an idea I had to simply get to know moms within my local community.  I interviewed moms in the Berwyn community and a few surrounding areas. From those discussions, paintings were created.  Twelve paintings were shown at New Life Community Church(Melrose) earlier this spring. More will be shown next February and March in a new show at Loyola University Chicago.  I started out to make friends and connections and gained so much more.

Thank you to the mothers who spent time with me!

Holding the Treasure
12x12
Acrylic Mixed Media Collage
©Antonia Ruppert

2.  For Lauren (private collection)

This painting meant so much to me because like my patron's daughter, I lost my father.  Being able to provide this painting from one of her only pictures of the two together, was heart-warming for me.  

Thank you Mia and Lauren!

For Lauren
18x24
Watercolor
©Antonia Ruppert

3.  Genesis of an Artist 

This painting was three years in the making.  I am so grateful that it is completed.  Not only did I complete it, I submitted it to the Museum of Science and Industry's Black Creativity juried art exhibit.  Though I won't know until December whether it was accepted, I am happy  to have completed the submission process.

Thank you to Elaine and all of my Facebook friends who helped me name this piece!

Genesis of an Artist
30x40

4. Joseph

This is a painting that will be unveiled at the Barrington Christmas Artwalk 2015 in December. Though I am not at liberty to share it now to you due to the unveiling,  know that I am grateful for this opportunity. You may find more info about the Christmas Artwalk 2015 online here.

Though this is not all I am thankful for,  these projects send me into worship to God.

Thank you for your continued support of me and the art God allows me to make. Happy Thanksgiving to all of you!

Art Everyday Month - Remembering those gone on

Remembering Those Gone On

Sketchbook

Watercolor and pencil

Art everyday.

Art Everyday Month - Ultra Creative Day

Progress on landscape

©Antonia Ruppert

Today was ultra creative in different ways. Don't you love days like that?

Not only did I work on a commissioned landscape, my daughter and I and a few other committed souls helped decorate our church for the holidays.

We laughed, listened to Christmas music and made the place spiffy.

Photos by Tiffany Daniels.

Earlier in the day, I noticed the blend of fall and winter.

Leaves in snow

© Antonia Ruppert

Winter leaves

© Antonia Ruppert

It was a lovely--ultra creative day.  Are you noticing your growing creativity as we move into this holiday season?

Art Everyday Month - A Song

Today's art is a song.  I love to paint. And I love to write. And I love to sing.

I grew up listening to my grandmother and her sisters sing. I thought everyone sung like that. It was just that natural.

Let me know if you can not hear this song and I can repost it as a link.

Thank you for listening.

Art Everyday Month - Filling Pages

Sketchbook drawing

Ink and Marker

© Antonia and Imani Ruppert

Filling pages starts with experiences. Boring, mundane experiences. Adventurous, exuberant experiences. They all mean something. 

Filling pages -whether for personal journaling or article writing- means expression of these experiences. You have to have a want - a desire to say something. 

I've been keeping a journal/sketchbook since I was 12 years old. I obviously adore filling pages.

When I opened the sketchbook today, I saw my ten year old's creation(she drew in my book!). I decided to add my own drawing with hers.

Two artists are better than one.

Art Everyday Month - Thank you Michael

Drawing of Michael
Ink on Paper
©Antonia Ruppert
 

 

Today's post is dedicated to my husband of 14 years, Michael. I'm so grateful to have someone to share not only my creative journey but life with. 

 

With gratitude.

Art Everyday Month - Be Your Own Best Fan

Just sayin'

24x30

Oil

Photography by BNHoskins Photography

©Antonia Ruppert

Sometimes you have to be your own best cheerleader. It matters not who likes your posts or who friends you. Sometimes you must come to the point in time where you have prayed and no one is there but you. 

That's okay.

Be your own friend. Like your own stuff. Enter the exhibit. Host the big dinner party. 

I'm taking my own advice. Despite the fear, I'm entering in two paintings into an exhibit I've wanted to enter for at least three years. The odds are stacked, but I can not win what I don't enter. 

Just sayin.'

Art Everyday Month - Accountability

New painting progress--Oil on canvas 

I told a friend today that posting daily is keeping me accountable to creating daily.   

It's funny what happens when you share a goal with someone. What about when you share a goal in a format like this?

I have found that accountability helps us use muscles we already had. The "want to" muscle. The "I wish" muscle.

Close-up of painting in progress.

Accountability + creativity = much productivity.

Art Everyday Month - Colorado Escape

"Flagstaff Mountain"

© Antonia Ruppert

Art Everyday Month continues. One of my new collectors obtained a pre-sale painting of Colorado from me.  Here is a preliminary sketch below.

This painting will be fun to paint because my collector chose two lovely colors: moss green and yam orange. Below is my initial watercolor using her colors. 

Next, I may create some additional studies (preliminary sketches, etc.) and then I'll be ready for the final painting (oil on canvas.)

When I see nature up close and so majestic, I can't help but sing Mali Music's:  

"All the glory belongs to You, all the glory belongs to You, Oh God."

Art Everyday Month - What's Your One Thing?

"Untitled"

Oil and Charcoal on Canvas

30x40

©Antonia Ruppert

Do that one thing first. That's what I learned today. My friend and fellow artist Elaine shared a resource with me- The One Thing - a book by Gary W. Keller and Jay Papasan.

The synopsis from their website- What’s the ONE Thing you can do such that by doing it everything else will be easier or unnecessary? 

That one thing for me was to finish this painting which I started in 2012.  I wanted to finish it to submit it for the Black Creativity 2016 juried exhibition held at Chicago's Museum of Science and Industry.  I felt like the painting needed revisions. Here is the painting before the revisions: 

"Untitled"

Oil and Charcoal on Canvas

30x40

©Antonia Ruppert 

Thank God I finished it before I left the house today. 

As it turns out, I blew a tire this afternoon. So I spent the day getting roadside assistance and getting my tire fixed. 

Surprisingly, nothing bothered me about how I was spending my time.  I had already completed my most creative work. 

So I ask you - What is your one thing such that by doing it would make your day?

I'd love to hear from you in the comments below.

Also, this painting is currently untitled - but on my Facebook page, I am currently accepting "title" suggestions.  Go there to share your suggestions.

I appreciate you already.

Art Everyday Month - Being Present

Drawing - Being Present
Watercolor and Ink
© Antonia Ruppert

Does a cell phone, which can transport one to game land, music land or social media land, help or hinder one's ability to be present? 

(Do you keep your cell phone dinging with notifications during family dinner)?

Today's art everyday creation is my hand holding my cell phone. I could see my face so I drew that too.

I had my cell phone in hand for a while. I had no desire to do anything with it but listen to some encouragement from Bishop T.D. Jakes and draw.  No surfing, etc.

Today, I chose to be present.

Art Everyday Month - Bad Hair

Bad Hair-drawing

Ink and watercolor

© Antonia Ruppert

As I drew myself today, focusing on my hair, I realized other people across the world are having a "bad hair day." Their bad hair is a symbol of death and carnage. 

As we say bedtime prayers tonight, may we remember our neighbors in Beirut and   

Paris.

Art Everyday Month - Day 13 - Revision time

Genesis of Survival--progress

Oil

30"x 40"

Making art everyday can help strengthen something you previously made. Today, I spent some time on an older painting. Revising tones and color. Here is how it looked before:

Genesis of Survival

Oil

30"x40"

My goal is to tweak it into greatness. I'll be sure to post the finished image.